100 Years After Part 2: Dancing with the Has-Beens

Naturally, Nobuta is the only one staring at the camera.

Last time: It's 100 years in the future, but no significant advancements have been made except for mechanical pets! The future Kyoryugers aren't dazzling and can't do splits, so they have no hope of defeating the Fashionista Bros. The new Paragon, Candelira, is still annoying and can't lead to save her life! The Love Touch remake has a 32% on Rotten Tomatoes and a 3.8 on IMDB! Okay, I made that last part up, but more importantly Luckiero is captured or something! But there is still hope, as the Kyoryugers discover their proper Ranger colors at almost exactly the same time, just as Candelira discovers some easily uncovered Beast Batteries! Can this uncanny streak of narrative convenience and luck continue long enough to bring the bad guys to their explosive deaths? Spoiler alert: Yes, it can.

Zyuden Sentai Kyoryuger: 100 Years After (People Stopped Caring)

I was originally going to make this post a super long one, but I've decided that since no one would be suicidal enough to read something that long (unless it's The Agony Booth), plus the fact that I need some actual content on here, I'm splitting it into two parts. Most recaps will probably be in multiple parts.

You're back! And no one missed you!

I can't stand Kyoryuger. I really can't. I know that it has its fans, and apparently it's one of the most financially successful seasons of Super Sentai in a while now, but if I were to introduce someone to this massive franchise, this is one of the last seasons that I'd use. Frankly, I think the characters are boring, the villains are ineffectual, and any chance of any sort of emotional impact that the series could have inflicted went down the drain almost instantly with lots of unfunny moments (with exceptions, of course), and inane asspulls on the writers' parts. I probably wouldn't be as pissed off if I hadn't already known that Super Sentai was capable of so much more, but I do know, and I'm very disappointed.

On that note, the wonderful, wonderful folks over at Over-Time just released their fansub of this direct-to-video spinoff movie, and being the unconditionally loyal fanboy that I am, graciously lent my free time to subject myself to the further adventures of the superhero team that I couldn't care less about. And I must say, wow. And not the happy, bubbly "Wow!" that Amy would sporadically shout in the show. I mean the shocked wow at the sheer knowledge that something this painfully annoying could exist. I may not be a big Kyoryuger fan, but nothing could have prepared me for this. I was wondering what my first real post should be, and then along came this "movie" (which is 51 minutes long, by the way, 50 minutes too long). And now you shall suffer with me, whoever was unfortunate enough to stumble on this page.

Obligatory Introductory Post

Hello, all.

So I started this blog, largely because I have spent far too long on the internet dealing with poorly written and unfunny reviews of stuff, and I thought to myself, "Hey, that could be me, too!" So now, naturally, here I am, writing half-assed and lazy blog posts about whatever happens to cross mind, most of it relating to random shit about pop culture, and virtually none of it to anything worthwhile. 

I am still not entirely sure of what I am going to be ranting on about, but it will definitely be very recapful, hence the title.

So anyway, a little about myself. I am a college student with embarrassing amounts of free time, and a tendency to talk about monsters and the rainbow colored freaks who fight them. I am the defender of all things Studio Ghibli and the destroyer of all things Seth MacFarlane and Chuck Lorre. 

Expect a lot of misinformation, infrequent updates, bias and narrow-mindedness, coming soon, to probably no one's computer screens.

Good-bye, all.